i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
