i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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