I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I want to have your abortion
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
