nut hugger
Can i not drive my cunt home
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
