We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
only if we run a train.
done.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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