is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
