Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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