I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize