There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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