i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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