Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Randomize