Its about making memories worth repressing
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
