You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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