Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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