Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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