Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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