My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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