we have pet lesbian snakes
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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