Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
