Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
