physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
