Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
