Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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