OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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