They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
we're so committed to being not committed
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
