its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
