lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
