Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
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