Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
