Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize