I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
You are a booty call, not a friend.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
