She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
