Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
no more duck duck goose at the bar
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize
