i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
