Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
