I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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