Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Randomize
