Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I have tasted many bathrooms
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
