The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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