last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize