Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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