Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
