fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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