You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
