toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
