The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
