wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
