He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I just found puke in my bra..
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
