I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
