You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
