What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
